As we begin the last full week of September, I am becoming painfully aware of how fast the time has flown by since the beginning of the school year. These past 2 months have been busy. We travelled to Southern California 3 times for various celebrations, all by car. Road tripping is way different when you have a 1 year old in the car. It’s an endless juggle between singing songs, iPad games, movies, and food. I can’t really blame her – who in their right minds would feel comfortable strapped into a seat for 6 hours? I am also proud to say that I survived the beginning of the school year at my new school. Though life is busier than I have ever remembered it to be, it has been all good.
The biggest change has been my new commute time – 5 minutes from home to school, as opposed to 30+ minutes in regular traffic. Just that in itself has been amazing! I am always early for work now (though, we will see how long that lasts…), have time to do my hair and eat breakfast at a table, and am less stressed. When I come home, I still have energy to play with my daughter. I love it, and don’t know why I didn’t make the change sooner.
This morning was one of those mornings where Dylann woke up on the wrong side of the bed. She was cranky…maybe from a bad dream or a late bedtime the night before. She wailed when I left the room, and as I was eating my breakfast downstairs I could hear her sobbing by the door of our bedroom. I caved. There was still an hour before I had to officially be at work, so I ended up going back upstairs to comfort her. We sat in the rocking chair, just like we used to when she was a little baby. She even let me cradle her. When I nursed her we used to have so much mommy-daughter time, just the two of us. I miss those days. I started thinking about how good it felt just to not rush and be able to still give Dylann the attention she needs. Because in the end, what’s going to matter is how I raised her and nurtured the relationship between us, not my job. Thank you, God, for blessing me with a workplace so close to home.
Later that evening she was watching TV while sitting on her little wooden stool. I went over to her and put my head down on her lap. She put her arm around my neck and left it there. My heart melted.
Don’t grow up too fast, babygirl.